How to become a manager

by QBase on 13/01/10 at 8:54 am

Let’s assume that you work hard for years but no one really appre­ci­ates it. And let’s just assume that you’re respon­si­ble of a cat­e­gory that no one else can fill. Well, maybe it’s time to become a manager.

In order to do so, there are a few things that you will have to do first:

1. Become lazy and do noth­ing except for the really urgent tasks.
2. Let all the work accumulate.

After a few months of (not) work­ing you should go to your boss and start nag­ging that you need extra assis­tant. After a few nag­ging the boss will become con­vinced that extra man is cru­cial in order to fill all the tasks. But find­ing good work­ers is hard and your boss doesn’t have the time to deal with it. At this point, you should tell your boss that you know a few peo­ple that can qual­ify per­fectly for the job.

But who shall it be?

If you recruit some­one that has more knowl­edge and more expe­ri­ence than you, it won’t serve you any good. After all, you want to become a man­ager and not to be man­aged by the new guy.

So this is what you have to do:

1. Pub­lish job require­ments that are less than really needed. This way you guar­an­tee that you will run the new per­son and not the opposite.
2. Make sure that the can­di­date is a hard worker man that will­ing to put all his might and work extra hours with­out over­time payment .
3. Make sure that the can­di­date has a low of self esteem so it won’t mat­ter for him when you take the credit for his hard work. You recruited a per­son that answers on the three conditions.

Now what?

Now it’s time to let the man adapt to his new workaround. Teach him what to do. As long as you show him what to do, he won’t have to be ‘cre­ative’ and do things on his own, and claim credit for that after­wards. Make sure that all his tasks are com­ing directly from you and not from the guys above. You wouldn’t like to have a worker that does other stuff than yours.

Take a notice that since you have a worker that does all your tasks, it leaves you plenty of time to do noth­ing. If you keep this track up, you will become a man­ager in no time, even if not offi­cially. Still, the other work­ers will give you respect and the boss will appre­ci­ate your enthusiasm.

After a cou­ple of months of man­ag­ing you should be ask­ing for raise. After all you are a man­ager now and you worked hard for that. The boss will prob­a­bly give you the raise, after all, why wouldn’t he? Your depart­ment (yes, now you have a depart­ment of your own) does all the tasks per­fectly and on time, and it’s all because of you. Of course you deserve a raise.

And when you hear the answer “ok” com­ing from your boss, you can smile and relax because you know that from now on, you are the offi­cial man­ager of the department.

So what do we do now? That’s right. Now it’s time to recruit another person…

How to become a man­ager, 8.1 out of 10 based on 8 rat­ings

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